𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿 - this week: BURN-OUT - J.H.M

Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly - an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝘽𝙐𝙍𝙉-𝙊𝙐𝙏 - 𝙅.𝙃.𝙈

Charles strikes a match and waits…

The life of an artist can be an arduous one. But then again, so can any life. Let’s focus on the artist side of things, since that’s what we all are. Artists, right? Being an artist used to mean just that. The arty type who is brilliant (or so they think) at arting, and not very much else. It was always forgiven that they could barely brush their teeth and dress themselves, because “oh, just LOOK at what they create”… Correction: artists could do these things, but would very often not bother (in the same way that they would forget to eat), because it was just not important to them. Art ran in their veins. It was their raison d’être. It plagued them. It excited them. It sedated them. Once they had created their latest masterpiece, it would be handed over to the man who knew nothing about art, but who was good at business. It was his job to advertise it and eventually flog it. There could even be a whole team involved. The artist was left to do what the artist was intended to do. Art. This way, everyone was happy and everyone stuck to what they did best. If said artist wanted to celebrate the completion of another piece by drinking himself into oblivion, then so be it. Little would suffer as a result, except maybe his liver.

These days, the mainstream world is pretty similar. A million minions working at what they do best, in order to complete the process of making a mint. The artist just makes the art. The thing is, the mainstream world is so absolutely tiny compared to that of the independent world. And it is THIS world where things differ. From “art”, we will zone into music. As an artist, do we spend weeks crafting excellence, or even just tossing off a stroke of genius in 20 minutes? Well, I do believe some of us do indeed do that. And then we hand over the raw demo to the session musicians, recording studio, recording engineer, mixing engineer and mastering engineer… No? Does your manager not sort that all out for you? Well, no. Most of us have not the means nor funds to even come close to being able to afford such luxuries. But let’s just say the actual record is complete. Then what? “Oh I dunno, my graphic designer sorts out the cover, and the PR team sorts out the rest. Ask THEM. I have nothing to do with that side of things”. Ha! Well that sounds like a dream; an unattainable one… You see, these days, we have rather a lot on our own plate. It’s like everyone’s shovelling their food on top of yours. The meal is never quite finished. There’s always just a few morsels to get through. At least you had a huge, satisfying meal, no? No; it wasn’t very good, and certainly wasn’t enjoyable…

Here’s how it might go: “I’ve written this fab new song. I think it has the makings of a hit! Right, now I’ve got to record all the parts. Acoustic guitar done. Ah wait, I’ve got to do it again for double-tracking. Should I use the same mic or a different one? Do I even HAVE another mic? Yeah, there’s an old one in the drawer somewhere. Okay, well that’s done. I don’t know if that was the right choice, but I’ve got to get to the next bit. Bass. Pretty simple; just plug it in and play. I’ll sort that later. Electric guitars next. Rock out, man!! Ah damn, that was the perfect take, but I went in too high. No, I don’t mean I had a joint on the go, but the level was too high and now it distorts - not in the good way. Will have to do it again. I do wish my guitar wouldn’t make that clicking sound when I play further up the neck. I’ll see if I can fix it later. Okay, drums. Been dreading this. I have to program it because I don’t have a drum kit, and I can’t play drums. Here I go with three fingers on a keyboard. Well, that sounded lousy. Wait! Logic Pro has that “Drummer” feature. It’s like poor man’s HAL (A.I.). Ah, that’s better. I know it’s a bit like cheating, but the drums are just there to create a decent sounding cool beat. I’m not pretending to be Dave Grohl. It’s not like HAL wrote the song! Okay, singing. I already hate this song. So sick of it. Is it even any good? Well I’ve come this far. I’ll make a cup of tea to warm up my voice. Here goes!!… Well, that was 72 takes of singing. There’s got to be something good there. NEXT!! Time to put together all the best bits. This always takes days. Now I’ve got to sort out all the timing and tuning. God, I thought I had sung better than this. Oh well. Oh god god god: the mixing. I really HATE this bit. I really should get someone to do this bit. It might just breathe life back into the song and allow me to enjoy the process again. Maybe next time. I just don’t know what I’m doing. I keep clicking presets and watching YouTube tutorials on How To Make Your Vocals Pop… Never works. I really can’t tell if this song is brilliant or terrible. Never mind; I’ve come this far. That’ll do for the mixing. Mastering? Chuck a limiter on the end to make it loud. Job done. Okay; cover art. HAL makes it so easy to make cover art, but no matter how many times I press Generate, it just doesn’t feel like ME. Back to various free apps. Okay, done. Upload to distributor. Time to tell the world their life is about to change! Smother social media with snippets and more graphics - 3 likes, 1 comment. Not bad. Not good. Must reply to that comment as it’s good for business. Got to hold their excitement for the eventual release day! Okay, IT’S OUT!!! Back to social media. Got to message everyone I know. Links Links Links. Got to check everything went smoothly with the upload. It didn’t. It’s not appearing on Apple Music. Got to get in touch with them. Or is it the distributor? Happy Release Day, they say. Isn’t very bloody happy, is it!! I’m stressed to the point of bulging eyeballs! Why aren’t people congratulating me on my latest masterpiece?? SURELY they saw my advertising on social media… I need to relax. Pick up the guitar and play a bit. Ooh, that’s good; that could be a verse. Then it dawns on me all the work I would have to do in order to complete and eventually release it… Not again. I can’t. I am utterly whacked out. But then I pick up my phone. Messages and comments trickle in: they likey! Suddenly it all seems worth it. And all for the initial song I wrote in the first place. The whole point of it all. I am, however, completely and utterly wrecked. Phew!”

This is what we call “burnout”. But sometimes, it might just be worth it. Please welcome, the one and only J.H.M, with his latest song, BURN-OUT. Jeff Maiers (J.M.H) is one of those “I do it all myself” types. A true Canadian D.I.Y. man. I have such a load of respect for Canadians. I don’t think I’ve met or known a bad one. They seem to take such pride in things being done properly, so will either do it all themselves, or at least make sure it is done to the highest level. But I would be hard pushed to find a Canadian for whom I have more respect than Jeff. He is so calm, sane, logical, intelligent, amusing, kind and honest. Having known him for 5 years (can you believe?!) and even worked with him on one song (Into The Wilderness), we speak on a weekly basis at least, knowing full well how the other feels without having to really say much. This is friendship. There is trust and there is honesty. There is shared wit and there is respect. But above all, I do consider Jeff to be a gentleman, in more ways than one. He is as gentlemanly as a man of the old way, but still comes across as modern and youthful. But he is also a man who is gentle. There is a softness to him that I rarely see in men these days, unless they’re weedy wimps. Jeff has a cashmere clad backbone. A bit like Roald Dahl’s ‘The BFG’, only he’s not very B, and he certainly ain’t no G. He is F as F though.

Quietly, he listens and he observes. From this, he understands. And it shows in his latest song, BURN-OUT. Jeff writes slightly differently to most songwriters, when it comes to lyrics. Most songwriters are writing from experience, and so it’s all I, I, I. It makes sense; it’s why we write songs. We need to express ourselves. Songs tend to either be “here’s how I feel or what I’ve been going through” or “here’s a movement to get behind: get behind it!”. Or it’s something like a song about parakeets. I don’t think Jeff will ever write in the way of the latter, as he doesn’t tend to show his humorous side in song too much. But rather than writing I, I, I, he tends to write from observation. You. So while it may still be his innermost thoughts and feelings, it is more likely to be his innermost thoughts and feelings of others. Perhaps this is all about him, and he doesn’t like the light shone in his face, so swivels the cowl of the lamp away from him and on to someone else... We will never know! Well, I suppose I could just ask him. But where’s the fun in that?! I like to believe that he is indeed “the great observer”. I thought I’d point this out, because it’s not the sort of thing one might instantly recognise or realise. In BURN-OUT, Jeff says "you" instead of the more usual "I". Throughout the song, “you”, “your” or “you’re” are used 16 times, yet “I” is only used once. And he doesn’t use “you” in an aggressive way either. It ain’t “I hate you. You ruined my life. I wish to God I’d never made you my wife”. Lord no! That’s not Jeff at ALL! Besides, he loves his wife. It’s more “I see you baby, shakin’ dat ass” - okay, no, that’s not Jeff either. It’s more “I’ve seen you struggling to carry that bag. Let me help you, you loveable hag”. You see, he CARES! He’s also a hell of a lot kinder and sweeter than I’ll ever be. Jokes aside, though: top lad.

So, I touched on the idea of “burnout” and how just SO many of us are affected by the blasted thing. It’s not a myth. It is VERY real. In the words of The Beatles, “Boy, you’re gonna carry that weight. Carry that weight a long time”. It’s what we all do. We carry it on our backs, building it higher and higher, until the whole lot comes crashing down upon us. And then we do it all over again. “Slow and steady” does not come naturally to most. Imagine if instead of a car having accelerator and brake pedals, it had accelerator and brake switches. Go full speed!! Immediate jolt to a standstill. Go full speed!! Immediate jolt to a standstill. Seems stupid with a car, but in life it’s what most of us do. Think exercise: pump those abs for 15 minutes until it feels like the devil himself is plunging his claws deep into your bowels… Then recover. Phew! Why do we do this in life? Well, mainly because we have no other choice. But also because sometimes, it’s needed. Sometimes things need that extra push, and you have to just keep going. Jeff sees this. Jeff DOES this. But Jeff wants to make sure people don’t quite get to that stage of burnout. I suppose in this way, it’s more of a “here’s a movement to get behind: get behind it!” song, but really it’s a plea. “It’s happened to me, I’ve seen it happen to many others, don’t let it happen to you” (not a quote). That’s almost certainly why the song’s title is in capital letters. LISTEN TO ME!!! But also, “Listen to my music, PLEASE!!!” - this is something about (inevitable) burnout: it has to be worth it. I completely burnt myself out with my ‘Hands Up!’ album, but I’m SO pleased I did. This way I can honestly say “I couldn’t have done it any better”. I would never like to have had that easy excuse.

I said Jeff ain’t no G, but he very much is; in a different way. G for Genius! The genius of writing classic songs that seem like they have always been. This is Jeff’s greatest legacy. He’s got a lovely voice, and he can play guitar well, but ultimately he’s a song man. In the same way That Noel Gallagher has a good voice and can play guitar, but he ain’t gonna be nominated for the Pavarotti and Van Halen awards. Noel’s songs, though… Well, you would only have needed to glimpse the crowd singing along a few evenings ago at the first Oasis comeback gig, to realise the power of classic song. And it’s THAT that Jeff has. Every single one of his songs sounds like a song that has been around forever. A song you know and love. He knows the “verse/chorus/verse/chorus/bridge/chorus” structure like he invented it. His melodies are inexplicably satisfying, and absurdly catchy. But I must say, while I glossed over his voice earlier, it is his own voice that makes it HIM. It is that voice that makes it personal, real, and believable. Jeff is a professional doing it all himself, as only he knows how. He puts in all the effort, and every release is proof that it’s always worth it.

Hard work is not only good; it’s RIGHT! I’m not saying we should be slaving away like, er, slaves, but we must put in the time and effort in order to achieve great results. If you find a quicker, easier or more efficient way of doing something just as well as you would have laboriously done it before, then do it. But make sure it remains YOU. It’s the chores of which you want to rid yourself; not the art. The way you play the guitar might be the very thing that people love about your song. The tone in your own voice might be exactly what makes someone fall in love with your song. It must stay organic, and inherently YOU. Which is EXACTLY what Jeff does.

Of course, we all do this constant stream of “go-go-go” out of necessity (we have to), but we do it because ultimately the satisfaction it brings at the end is unparalleled. However… Pro Tip if you’re concerned about the whole process (and burnout): A mixing engineer makes perfect sense because it’s not just about time; it’s about knowledge and technical experience that most artists might lack. Not to mention peace of mind and more time to do the things you love. Yes, that’s a shameless plug. Ahem. But I ain’t doing your social media posts!

Roald Dahl’s sequel, The JHM, didn’t sell so well. Probably because it stood for Jaded Humble Midget.

Do NOT refer to Jeff by this name, or he’ll call for the real BFG (Ed).

Listen to 𝘽𝙐𝙍𝙉-𝙊𝙐𝙏 on the 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿 Spotify playlist HERE!

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